As she prepares for her wedding, the Original Poster (OP) finds herself embroiled in a contentious battle of wills against her fiancé and his conservative family, who are determined to shape the ceremony to fit their traditional norms. The climax of this ongoing struggle culminates when OP, pushed to her limits, asserts herself by issuing an ultimatum that jeopardizes the future of her impending marriage. As the tension escalates, one can only wonder if the love they once shared will survive this tumultuous wedding planning saga.
The Engagement Announcement
OP and her fiancé, originating from a conservative family, announce their impending marriage. His mother quickly steps into the role of wedding planning supervisor, hoping to control all elements of the event. She is fixated on eliminating anything that might be perceived as offensive.
The Dress Dilemma
When choosing her wedding dress, OP is directed to get a more conservative option, one that doesn’t reveal much skin. She finds herself in the middle of a dress selection controversy centered around traditional values versus her personal preferences. Tension starts to mount.
OP decides to show her fiancé various makeup looks she’s considering for the wedding. To her surprise, he reacts negatively, fearing his mother’s disapproval. OP is again caught in a disagreement revolving around wedding aesthetics.
The Mother’s Intervention
In an unexpected move, the fiancé’s mother sends OP images of models wearing minimal makeup, suggesting she adopt a similar style. She attempts to replace OP’s desired vibrant, eye-catching makeup with a more toned-down look. It’s another clear demonstration of her intent to control the wedding proceedings.
The First Standoff
OP, increasingly frustrated, refuses to choose from any of the mother’s suggested makeup styles. She’s unwilling to comply with the mother’s attempt to dictate her appearance on her big day. This leads to a heated argument and further escalates the tension.
The Fiancé’s Fury
Her fiancé returns home and is furious about OP’s rebellious stance. He accuses her of intending to humiliate him and his family at the wedding by looking like a clown. It’s a new twist that reveals a growing rift between the couple, instigated by the mother’s intervention.
The Delusional Dispute
OP snaps and labels her fiancé as delusional for expecting her to bend to his mother’s wishes regarding her makeup. She asserts that she should have the final say on how she looks since it’s her face. A new dynamic emerges as OP begins to assert her autonomy.
The Marriage Misunderstanding
Her fiancé counters by suggesting that there’s no concept of “mine” or “yours” in a marriage. He accuses OP of immaturity, intensifying the strain in their relationship. The tension grows as his stance reveals a potential ideological conflict regarding personal boundaries in marriage.
The Cold Shoulder
After their argument, the fiancé starts avoiding OP, stating, “You know why I’m avoiding you.” This demonstrates an emotional distancing tactic, leading to a breakdown in communication. The stress mounts as the couple refuses to speak to one another before the wedding.
The Mother’s Message
OP receives a text from her fiancé’s mother, claiming she has OP’s best interests at heart. The mother’s intrusion into their relationship extends to personal messages. It becomes clear that her interference is a significant source of the couple’s problems.
The Friends Factor
OP confides in her friends about the escalating issues surrounding her wedding, including the silent feud with her fiancé and the standoff with his mother. Her friends voice their concerns about her fiancé and his family’s controlling behavior.
The Pre-Marital Counseling
In an effort to resolve their issues, OP and her fiancé start attending pre-marital counseling. Counseling sessions bring underlying conflicts to the forefront, leading to intense conversations and revelations.
Feeling cornered, OP issues an ultimatum: Either the wedding happens on her terms, or it doesn’t happen at all. It’s a bold move that underscores the severity of their issues. The ultimatum puts their relationship and impending wedding in serious jeopardy.
Was The Fiancée’s Behavior Appropriate?
OP posts her story online for feedback. The readers in the forum had a lot of mixed views on the matter. Here are some of their responses:
One reader said, “Do not marry this person. Do not marry this person. Do NOT marry this person. Unless you really want to marry his mom because that’s whose calling all the shots here.”
Another Commenter Thinks
Another responder wrote, “OP, please back out of the wedding. He doesn’t love you. He has no boundaries with his family, either.”
A Third View on The Story
A different person stated, “Love yourself enough to recognize abuse. This is 100% the start of a very bad story. You will regret the ending.”
A Final Perspective on the Matter
Another reader commented, “He is showing you he will always look to his mom for what’s right and follow her lead. If you marry him, you are essentially marrying into his mom’s standards and ideals because she controls his life.”
What Do You Think?
What are your thoughts on their actions?
What would you have done in this situation?
This story is inspired by a thread from an online forum.