bad engagement proposal unsure

She’s Been There for Him Through Thick and Thin, But She Puts Her Foot Down After He Gives an Ultimatum.

In a tale of love, recovery, and conflict, the Original Poster (OP) navigates a treacherous turn in her relationship when her fiancé, influenced by a coworker, proposes a prenuptial agreement.

A Proposal With Strings Attached

Bored millennial lady not willing to accept engagement ring proposal unsure
image credit: prostock-studio/shutterstock

OP’s fiancé surprises her with a request for a prenuptial agreement, ensuring that if their marriage ends, they will both keep what they came into the marriage with. This catches OP completely off guard.

Uncovering the Past

young couple hugging and holding each other together
image credit: spectral-design/shutterstock

Six years ago, when OP and her fiancé met, he was struggling with drug and alcohol addiction and severe depression. OP invested her time and energy into aiding his recovery, standing by him when he was at his lowest.

The Climb to Recovery

couple fight grief sad
image credit: fizkes/shutterstock

OP’s fiancé turns his life around, breaking free from his addiction and his depressive state. He even resumes his education, graduates with honors, and lands a solid career. However, OP feels her role in his recovery is being overlooked.

Persistent Battle Against Addiction

woman warning pointing finger
image credit: khosro/canva

There’s a point when OP has to explain to her fiancé that occasional hard drug use was not an option. She was happy to be there for him, but there was no doubt that it was a long road to recovery, and she had been there every step of the way.

OP’s Sacrifice

woman proud confident pointing at herself
image credit: khosro/canva

As her fiancé re-enters school, OP juggles her own studies, full-time work, and supporting him academically. She even pays for his exams when he cannot afford them. She was committed to him from the beginning of their relationship.

Emerging Stability

couple happy together holding hands staring
image credit: roman-samborskyi/shutterstock

Having overcome their early struggles, the couple now enjoy a stable lifestyle. Both have good careers, rent a nice house, and have financial stability. The prenuptial agreement conflict threatens their otherwise happy life together.

A Matter Of Assets

woman angry serious huh
image credit: khosro/canva

For OP, prenups are reserved for famous people or people with a lot of assets. They live a comfortable lifestyle, but they certainly don’t fall into those categories. She has no plans of divorcing him, so this seems like a silly use of time and money.

Not About the Money

young couple talking fighting argument defensive
image credit: fizkes/shutterstock

OP clarifies that her opposition to the prenup is not driven by greed, as they both earn similar salaries and are not particularly materialistic. The issue is deeper, rooted in an acknowledgment of past support.

Miss Independent

woman upset social media computer work
image credit: khosro/canva

OP is also currently pursuing her graduate studies. She can take care of herself if needed. That is another reason why she is confused. She isn’t trying to use her fiancé in any way.

Recognition Denied

poc woman angry frustrated
image credit: RollingCamera/shutterstock

OP feels insulted that the prenuptial agreement seems to erase her role in her fiancé’s success. The document would state that she had no part in his accomplishments pre-marriage. This raises a conflict of recognition and respect in their relationship.

Unfair Expectations

woman young sitting tired worried stressed sad guilt depressed grief troubled
image credit: josep-suria/shutterstock

The thought of asking her fiancé to sign a similar agreement feels wrong to OP. This highlights her sentiment of the prenup being unjust and one-sided.

A Surprise Revelation

young woman worried nervous thinking stressed
image credit: kraken-images/shutterstock

OP discovers that the idea of the prenup wasn’t her fiancé’s but his coworker’s. She also discovers that this coworker had recently been through a nasty divorce himself.

Intensifying Tensions

poc couple fighting arguement upset
image credit: wavebreakmedia/shutterstock

OP’s refusal to sign the prenup starts causing a rift between the couple. Their once-solid bond begins to crack under the weight of this disagreement. The potential for a happy life together starts to seem uncertain. Will refusing to sign a prenup break a six-year bond?

Was Refusing To Sign A Prenup Appropriate?

couple together thinking
image credit: cast-of-thousands/shutterstock

The readers in the forum had a lot of mixed views on the matter. Here are some of their responses:

Forum Responds

shocked male clueless phone social huh
image credit: Roman Samborskyi/shutterstock

One reader said, “You say the prenup is 50/50, so I really don’t see the issue there. You may have helped your partner get through a really rough time and come out of the other end, but in the end, everything he’s earned, HE earned. You say you don’t expect to be rewarded for the help you gave him, yet the message between the lines says otherwise.”

Another Commenter Thinks

male thinking looking at phone
image credit: pepsky/canva

Another responder wrote: “Yes, you had a part in his success prior to you guys getting married. However, that was not done with the intention of being compensated for his future success.”

A Third View on The Story

Young business male working with laptop on beautiful scenic mountain land
image credit: deliris/shutterstock

A different person states, “You should talk to him, explain how you feel. This seems like a relatively new idea to him, so just explain how you feel about it. Communication is vital in a relationship.”

A Final Perspective on the Matter

couple surprised social phone happy
image credit: dean-drobot/canva

Another viewpoint on the story: “Him suggesting a prenup is just a safeguard for both of you and not because he doesn’t love you. Don’t let a prenup which states that you keep what you earned fall between you marrying someone who you love and who also loves you back.”

What Do You Think?

group business meeting discussion jobs
image credit: tom-merton/canva

What are your thoughts on their actions?

What would you have done in this situation?

This story is inspired by a thread from an online forum.

More From Top Dollar

angry frustrade male upset
photo credit: kurhan/shutterstock

When He Asked His Neighbors to Move Their Car From His Driveway, He Never Expected the Problem to Continue.

More From Top Dollar

worried woman
image credit: pio3/canva

She Fought Tooth and Nail to Pay Off Her Mortgage, Only to Stumble Upon a $80,000 Hurdle She Never Saw Coming.

More From Top Dollar

adult girls sisters friends siblings argue fight
image credit: kamil-macniak/shutterstock

She Asked Her Mother to Watch Her Daughter For an Afternoon, But the Day’s Events Led to a Permanent Babysitting Ban.

More From Top Dollar

young annoyed angry woman with bad attitude giving talk to hand gesture stop
image credit: esb-professional/shutterstock

She Was Excluded from a Co-worker’s Wedding, So When the Office Collected Money For a Celebratory Luncheon, She Refused to Pitch In.

More From Top Dollar

woman plane airplane flying
image credit: juice-flair/shutterstock

She Refused to Give Boss Her First-Class Seat Upgrade on the Flight Home From a Business Trip.