In a modern romance tale, the Original Poster (OP) navigates the complexities of dating a professional while battling society’s biases and old friendships. A casual catch-up with an old college friend spirals into a whirlwind of gossip, mistrust, and self-doubt. With their relationship on display, OP defends the sanctity of their love and her boyfriend’s profession.
OP, a 30-year-old woman, starts dating her 31-year-old boyfriend during the pandemic. As the world reels, he completes his OBGYN residency and joins a private practice. Their love grows stronger, hinting at a future engagement.
After several years, OP reconnects with a college friend over a phone call. Social media’s absence in OP’s life means many are unaware of her ongoing relationship. Recollections turn into updates as she reveals her partner’s profession.
An Unexpected Reaction
Upon learning about the boyfriend’s profession, the friend exclaims in surprise. She makes a questionable comment about him “looking at women’s privates all day.” OP is taken aback, trying to decipher her friend’s true intent.
Probing the Uncomfortable
OP’s friend, seemingly unaware of her insensitivity, continues to prod. “Doesn’t it make you insecure?” she asks. Questions hint at doubts about his professional ethics and her insecurities, leaving OP on edge.
The Implications of Doubt
The friend’s line of questioning delves deeper, suggesting a breach of trust in OP’s relationship. The insinuation is clear: Is OP’s boyfriend truly faithful, or is he swayed by what he sees daily? A cloud of suspicion threatens their love story.
Anger swells up in OP, viewing the comments as an attack on her relationship and a distortion of her boyfriend’s professionalism. His integrity as a partner and a doctor comes under scrutiny by someone who OP isn’t even close with anymore.
Sexism Enters the Fray
OP recognizes an underlying tone of sexism in her friend’s comments. The realization dawns that these concerns wouldn’t be raised if she were dating a female OBGYN. Gender biases sneak into a conversation meant to reconnect old friends.
The Breaking Point
Unable to bear the baseless assumptions and allegations any longer, OP confronts her friend. In a mix of frustration and disbelief, she tells her how inappropriate her comments are. A conversation that began in reminiscence ends in a sudden disconnect.
Silence Speaks Volumes
Following the abrupt end of their conversation, an uneasy silence descends on their relationship. Despite her missteps, the friend doesn’t reach out to make amends. Meanwhile, OP battles feelings of guilt and anger.
Unbeknownst to OP, her friend shares the details of their conversation with mutual acquaintances. Whispers of doubt about OP’s boyfriend’s professionalism spread like wildfire. A personal discussion takes a public turn, exacerbating her emotional turmoil.
Confronting the Gossip
Upon hearing rumors, OP decides to confront the issue head-on. She reaches out to those discussing her boyfriend, emphasizing his dedication to his profession. Every conversation becomes a testament to trust and professionalism.
Regrets and Remorse
Hearing of the rumors and their spread, the college friend realizes the gravity of her words. She sees the damage her offhand comments have caused. Guilt gnaws at her, prompting introspection.
Confused and hurt, OP turns to close friends and family for guidance. Their perspectives, a blend of support and concern, provide her a refuge from her inner turmoil. Among them, she finds strength and clarity.
Was The Woman’s Behavior Appropriate?
Unsure how to process her feelings, OP turns to the internet community for direction. She posts her story online, hoping for some sage advice and reassurance from strangers. The readers in the forum had a lot of mixed views on the matter.
One reader said, “As a registered nurse, I’ve seen and touched many people; not only is it NEVER inappropriate, but some healthcare workers have a negatively affected intimate lives because of it. It’s part of the job.”
Another Commenter Thinks
Another responder wrote, “Your friend is sexualizing a medical service. I bet she never birthed a child, right? I hope she grows up if she plans to do that, or else she’s in for a LOT of uncomfortable situations.”
A Third View on The Story
A different person stated, “Your friend was being rude and judgmental. You didn’t yell at her or call her names. You expressed your feelings and ended the conversation, a mature response to immature assumptions.”
A Final Perspective on the Matter
Another reader commented, “She is just projecting her insecurity, and it was horrible to call into question his professionalism. Though one might get the same question if you were dating a woman, I loathe to think of the discrimination a lesbian gyno would face.”
What Do You Think?
What are your thoughts on their actions?
What would you have done in this situation?
This story is inspired by a thread from an online forum.