Mother Defies Tradition for Daughter's Education, But the Father's Reaction to Their Daughter's New Lifestyle Sparks a Family Crisis.

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Caught in a profound cultural clash, the Original Poster (OP) navigates a tumultuous path as she seeks education and freedom for her daughter, straying from the traditional values held by her husband. This daring pursuit of change for her daughter ignites a family-wide conflict, reaching a boiling point as her husband discovers their daughter’s divergent lifestyle abroad. Will this family manage to mend their differences, or will they crumble under the weight of unmet expectations?

A Long-lasting Union

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OP has been married to her husband since she was 18. Together, they have a son and a daughter, and although they are not wealthy, they lead a comfortable life. They’ve managed to provide a high-quality education for their son abroad.

A Secret Passion for Knowledge

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Upon gaining access to the internet, OP immerses herself in self-education, using resources like MIT courseware and YouTube. This stirs in her a strong desire for her daughter to have a solid education. Meanwhile, OP secretly abandons her faith yet continues to follow religious customs to appease her devout husband.

A Different Plan for the Daughter

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The plan for the daughter was to find her a suitable husband from a reputable family and perhaps attend a local university if she desired. This is starkly different from the path set out for the son. However, OP harbors a more ambitious plan for her.

The Convincing Argument

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OP persuades her husband that a Western-educated woman would be more desirable for prominent families, enhancing their daughter’s marriage prospects. She convinces him to let their daughter study at a renowned overseas university. The husband relents, allowing their daughter to pursue a prestigious education.

The Daughter’s Revelation

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After moving abroad for her studies, the daughter confides in OP that she, too, has lost her faith. She embarks on a new lifestyle, divergent from her traditional upbringing. OP, however, can only vicariously experience this freedom.

A Successful Graduate

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The daughter graduates from the university, lands a good job, and obtains a work visa in a Western country. She decides to stay there, carving a life for herself away from her family’s religious and cultural confines.

A Father’s Anger

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The husband, upon hearing the news of the daughter’s independent lifestyle, feels deceived. His anger is primarily directed towards OP, as she was the one who convinced him to fund their daughter’s education abroad.

Evidence of Rebellion

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The husband finds an online photo of their daughter without a headscarf, receiving a prize at a university competition. This ignites his rage further, reinforcing his feelings of betrayal. The daughter’s unveiled appearance in public shatters his expectations and religious norms.

A Guilt-ridden Mother

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OP grapples with feelings of guilt, bearing the weight of her husband’s accusations. His money enabled their daughter’s journey to Western education and freedom. However, the success of her plans could mean never seeing her daughter again.

A Love Story in Peril

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The husband’s fury and the distance from their daughter strain OP’s marriage. He feels cheated, blaming OP for misleading him about their daughter’s intentions. A household that was once peaceful now teeters on the brink of discord.

A Family’s Divide

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As the husband’s anger persists, a clear divide forms within the family. On one side, the husband clings to his traditional views, while on the other, OP and the daughter advocate for a more modern approach.

The Pressure of Tradition

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Even as she lives with guilt and fear, OP realizes she must maintain appearances for her community. Upholding societal expectations and the family’s reputation become paramount. She finds herself torn between protecting her daughter’s freedom and preserving her own place in their traditional society.

The Daughter’s Struggle

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Away from her family, the daughter wrestles with her newfound independence and the backlash from her father. Living in a foreign land, she is thrilled with her new lifestyle yet troubled by her family’s disappointment. The success she thought would bring joy also brings unexpected sorrow.

The Unseen Brother

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The son remains largely absent from this familial upheaval. As the family discord escalates, the son finally breaks his silence. He steps forward, revealing his support for his sister and mother, shocking his father.

An Unexpected Reconciliation

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Just when things seem their bleakest after numerous heated debates, the husband begins to reconsider his stance. He starts to see the value of his daughter’s independence and education, but the path to reconciliation remains complex.

Was The Wife’s Behavior Appropriate?

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OP posts her story on an international community website to gain perspective. The readers in the forum had mixed views on the matter. Here are some of their responses:

Forum Responds

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One reader said, “You are a good mother who wants her daughter to have a better life! Allowing her to make her own life choices is awesome!”

Another Commenter Thinks

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Another responder wrote, “You did what any amazing mother would and gave your daughter access to the world, something she wouldn’t have had otherwise. And you’ve educated yourself too! Be very proud of both of these things!”

A Third View on The Story

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A different person stated, “You are a hero. You found a way to give your daughter the life she deserves. The only reason you don’t have money is because of your repressive culture, and that is not your fault. And as you know, your daughter is entitled to her own relationship with religion.”

A Final Perspective on the Matter

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Another commenter replied, “It is not HIS money that paid for her education. It is YOUR JOINTLY HELD money, and you have an equal right to it and how it is spent, according to most Western nations’ laws on marriage and property rights.”