New Father-To-Be Anxiously Anticipates Holding His Newborn Baby, But When His Wife Delivers an Unimaginable Ultimatum, His Dream of Fatherhood Becomes Questionable.

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In a whirlwind of joy and anticipation, the Original Poster (OP) and his wife prepare for the birth of their first child, only for OP to be blindsided by an unexpected exclusion from the delivery room. Despite the couple’s attempts at understanding and compromise, tension escalates into a seismic ultimatum, threatening the very fabric of their relationship. As the birthday approaches, readers are left on edge, wondering if the couple can reconcile their differences in time for their child’s arrival.

The Birth Plan Begins

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OP and his wife, heavily pregnant with their first child, began working on their birth plan together. The couple visited doulas, picked a hospital, and laid out emergency procedures. OP felt involved and expected to be present during the birth.

Unexpected Exclusion

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In a surprising turn, OP’s wife expressed her preference for her mother to be the only one present during the birth. OP was told he could see their newborn only after the birth. This left him shocked and upset since he had been eagerly looking forward to the birth.

The Aftermath of Disappointment

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Hurt by his wife’s decision, OP requested some space for a few days. He retreated to their guest room, leaving early for work before his wife woke up. He carried his pain quietly, wrestling with feelings of rejection and disappointment.

The Bombardment of Texts

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While OP was away, his phone was filled with texts from his wife. She accused him of unfairly punishing her and putting undue stress on her during her pregnancy. These messages only intensified the emotional turmoil OP was experiencing.

Emotional Roller Coaster

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In the midst of the text barrage, OP received a distressing call from his wife. She was crying, calling him out for causing her unnecessary stress. OP was taken aback, unsure if he was the one in the wrong.

Personal Space and Reflection

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Despite the accusations from his wife, OP stood his ground. He maintained that he needed some time to process the situation. His heart ached at the thought of missing out on the birth of their child. The issue was not related to health concerns, which only deepened his confusion.

Anger and Accusations

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Adding fuel to the fire, his wife’s anger escalated. She questioned whether OP was being unreasonable, which left him wondering if he was indeed being insensitive. The rift between them continued to widen.

Unexpected Encounter

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OP crossed paths with his mother-in-law, the chosen birth companion, and the couple home shortly before the due date. The meeting was strained and awkward, with both parties unsure of how to handle the situation. This further underlined the complexity of the situation OP found himself in.

Clash with Mother-in-Law

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OP confronts his mother-in-law about her part in the birth plan, wondering if she is influencing her daughter’s decision. Accusations are thrown, and the situation escalates, causing more tension between the family members. The discord continues to grow, adding more complexity to an already complicated scenario.

Unexpected Health Scare

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Leading up to the final month, OP’s wife experiences a minor health scare, causing an emergency hospital visit. Though she was declared stable, the incident serves as a stark reminder of their shared concern for their unborn child. This incident brings a new perspective to OP’s situation, but it doesn’t make his exclusion any easier.

Friend’s Intervention

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A close friend intervenes, offering a different perspective on the situation. The friend suggests that OP’s wife might be protecting him from the stress and potential fainting spell during childbirth. Though plausible, this explanation does not quell OP’s desire to witness the birth.

A Doula’s Perspective

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In a session with the doula, OP opens up about his feelings of exclusion. The doula shares insights on childbirth and the potential stress it can put on the mother. However, she also acknowledges OP’s natural desire to be part of the birth.

Marital Mediation

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OP and his wife engage in a couple’s mediation session. The mediator helps facilitate a dialogue between them, revealing hidden fears and unresolved issues. The session ends with a new understanding but no clear resolution on the birth plan.

An Unexpected Ultimatum

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In a heated argument, OP’s wife issues an ultimatum: accept her birth plan or reconsider their relationship’s future. OP is blindsided by the ultimatum, leaving him to contemplate his role as a soon-to-be father and husband. The stakes have never been higher.

Was The Couple’s Behavior Appropriate?

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The readers in the forum had a lot of mixed views on the matter. Here are some of their responses:

Forum Responds

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One reader said, “If you two have a generally loving, trusting, and supportive relationship, then tell her also that part of your hurt is feeling she doesn’t trust you to support, but you understand if only one person is allowed why she would want her mom who’s done it before to be the one. Could it also be that she’s worried about how you will view her after?”

Another Commenter Thinks

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Another responder wrote: “She is allowed to choose whoever she wants in the room, and you’re allowed to take a day to sort your feelings. You didn’t abandon her. You took space to organize your thoughts. Sometimes it’s best to be quiet for a bit instead of saying something mean or not thought out.”

A Third View on The Story

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A different person states, “There’s a lot of pressure on women to always remain sexy for their husbands. Maybe ask her if she’s insecure. Just a thought.”

A Final Perspective on the Matter

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Another viewpoint on the story: “You are understandably hurt by this because seeing your child be born is a once-in-a-lifetime opportunity. That’s also okay. Sometimes, we need to take ourselves out of a situation to avoid escalation.”