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Woman Declines Mother-In-Law’s Dish at Family Dinner, But a Dark Memory From Her Past Holds the Key to Her Refusal.

The Original Poster (OP), a dark-skinned woman, faces cultural and familial tension at a dinner party hosted by her Asian-American husband’s family. OP steadfastly refuses to partake in a meal prepared by her mother-in-law, igniting an intense, unresolved conflict that resonates throughout their family dynamic.

The Dinner Party

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OP and her husband attended a dinner party arranged by his mother. The atmosphere was cheerful, and everyone seemed to be in high spirits. The husband’s extended family was present, including several aunts, uncles, and cousins.

An Unexpected Announcement

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As dinner time approached, OP’s mother-in-law (MIL) announced she had prepared a new dish. Everyone gathered around to enjoy the meal. Still, OP felt uneasy about trying the unfamiliar cuisine.

A Disconcerting Question

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After a few minutes into the dinner, MIL noticed that OP had not made herself a plate yet. MIL, confused, asked OP about her hesitation. OP shared she wasn’t in the mood to eat, complimenting the food nonetheless.

The Outburst

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MIL did not take the explanation well. She felt disrespected and launched into a rant about the effort she put into preparing the meal. The situation escalated rapidly, leaving everyone at the table in shock.

Husband’s Reluctance

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OP looked to her husband for support, only to find him avoiding confrontation with his mother. His lack of response added to the tension, making the situation more awkward. The family dinner had taken an unexpected and uncomfortable twist.

Cousin’s Intervention

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One of the husband’s cousins decided to intervene, suggesting that OP at least take a small bite. Despite the pressure, OP stood her ground. She reaffirmed her position, citing a stomach ache and refusing to eat against her will.

Unfair Accusations

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MIL accused OP of implying she was unclean and didn’t prepare the food with proper food safety and cleanliness, a notion that had nothing to do with the crux of OP’s hesitation. A confrontation ensued where MIL alleged OP of being discriminatory and refusing to appreciate Asian cuisine. The situation went from bad to worse in a matter of seconds.

Dinner Aftermath

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The dinner continued awkwardly following the confrontation between OP and MIL. Accusations were thrown, and tempers were high. OP remained quiet for the rest of the evening, absorbing the criticism thrown her way and not trying to escalate the situation any further. Nevertheless, she stood firm not to eat the food.

Husband’s Feedback

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After dinner, her husband shared his thoughts. He felt OP should have tried a bite to keep the peace. OP was taken aback, feeling unsupported by her spouse. She felt that her husband should have supported her and stood up for her while MIL threw wild and offensive accusations.

OP’s Stand

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Despite the evening’s tension, OP held her stance. She shared with her husband how her mother taught her not to eat just anyone’s cooking, and she refused to eat a dish that looked completely unappetizing. OP maintained she shouldn’t be forced to eat something she didn’t want.

The Repercussions

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The evening’s events had a profound impact on OP and her relationship with her in-laws. Tensions were high, and the atmosphere became uncomfortable. The dinner party had turned into a night of conflict. OP was immensely relieved when the dinner had ended.

Childhood Trauma

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OP shared a memory from her childhood to further explain her hesitance. She recounted how both she and her mother fell sick after consuming food prepared by her father’s family. The experience left a deep impact, affecting her willingness to try unfamiliar dishes.

The Question of Fault

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OP ended her post by questioning if she was the wrong party in this situation. She stood her ground based on past experiences and personal comfort, leading to a heated dinner party. The event led her to question her actions and their implications.

The night’s fallout cast a shadow on future family gatherings. OP was unsure of how to navigate the tense relationships and felt isolated. The future of their family interactions hung in the balance, leaving a sense of uncertainty.

Was The Woman’s Behavior Appropriate?

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The readers in the forum had a lot of mixed views on the matter. Here are some of their responses:

Forum Responded

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One reader said, “I am adamantly against the concept that you must eat the food provided even if you don’t like it for the sake of politeness, but damn your reasoning for not even tasting the food is that your MIL cooked it. Yeah, that’s just rude, mean, cruel, and tactless.”

Another Viewpoint

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Another responder wrote: “I would not have gone to a dinner party without at least expecting to eat something. It feels quite disrespectful towards the host and their time in preparing so much, and Asian food can take quite a while to make.”

A Different Perspective

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A different person states, “If you were feeling so unwell that you couldn’t even eat a bite, then you should have stayed at home. What you did was rude, frankly bizarre, and you potentially passed on whatever stomach thing you had going on that day, which is inconsiderate.”

What Do You Think?

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What are your thoughts on their actions?

What would you have done in this situation?

This story is inspired by a Reddit thread.

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